Emily's Progress Report: A++ for the teachers and the student!

On Thursday I was lucky to have the opportunity to see Emily during school. Parents were invited to spend an hour in the classroom with their child to see what a typical day is like. I don't ever remember my schools doing this when I was young, and what a shame! I learned so much more in that one hour than from all of the notes home and parent conferences combined. A lot of the time I feel a little out of the loop when it comes to her education, since the bus takes her and I rarely step inside her classroom. This was a most welcome opportunity. Emily showed me her favorite puzzles, painted me a picture, and showed off on the fancy computer equipment they have for classroom activity time. After seeing all of the resources on hand for Emily and her peers, it is little surprise that she is making so many strides.

Emily and a friend painting. Everyday the kids have a free-play period, and at least 2 times a week Emily chooses art.

Here Emily is sitting on the pillow while the other children take their turn on the big computer, and then it was her turn. She had to pick a letter (she picked "E"), and then she played a matching game in which she dragged and dropped the letters across the board.

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In addition to having fun playing with Emily, I got the chance to see how her classroom is run. All I can say is that Emily has an amazing team of teachers and specialists working on her behalf, and I am so truly grateful. In addition to her teacher Mrs. Mack, there are 2 classroom helpers that just adore the kids. There are 3 adults and 10 kids. This may seem like a lot, but remember most of these kids have severe delays. Some can't talk, one little boy was in a wheelchair, and most aren't potty trained. A lot of one-on-one time is needed just for the simple things. There is also a speech therapist and a occupational therapist on site working with all of the Early Childhood classrooms (Em is in one of three or four classes). They all tell me that they are pleased with her progress.

Speaking of progress, Ryan and I have noted two major changes in Emily over the past few weeks. After swimming at Shane's birthday party in late January, Emily told me about "the beach". Since then, she has slowly but surly begun talking about events in her recent past. Ladies and gents, this is simply amazing!!! She has never really shown an understanding for much outside of the present moment. Out of sight, out of mind. But not anymore! The only thing that is slightly confusing is that she hasn't mastered the idea of past tense verbs yet, so we have to decipher what she's talking about based on our understanding of her day. For example, when Ryan came home for lunch she said "I peed my pants!" I was shocked, because she had peed in her pants earlier that morning and I couldn't believe she had done it twice. Well, she hadn't. She was just sharing the events of her day. When we got home from the zoo, she said, "Animals! Zoo animals!". No verbs there, but again she was telling her Dad about something she had seen rather than what was in the room.

The other big-to-do involves potty training. She is still not trained by any stretch of the imagination. I have thus concluded that, in addition to not being able to hold a pencil with the correct grasp, she can't fully control all the muscles needed in order to use the toilet like the rest of us. She is in underpants during the day, but we set a timer and put her on the potty at the prescribed time. As noted above, an extra helping of juice can put the schedule out of whack. Oh my poor floors. Anyhow, there has been progress, and now I am hopeful she will be potty trained by her 5th birthday (that is sadly not an exaggeration, its realistic). Twice in the past week Emily has said, "I pooped my pants" but actually meant she needed to go. She has come up to me before the accident and used the potty. Again, there is a bit of a language barrier because she doesn't understand tenses, but the idea got across nonetheless. I am thrilled. Someday I will not be changing her diapers or mopping puddles off the floor.

Emily's progress is off the charts. I wish some of her first therapists could see her now. They wouldn't recognize this social, imaginative, almost-chatty, sweet girl. I am so happy for Emily, and blessed to have such amazing teachers in our life. I know I couldn't raise her properly without their help, love, and support.

Random Silly Pics

Well I shared a pic of baby Nora, so I had to share one of Emily too! This was taken on September 27, 2007. She was almost four months old. Still prefered nothing but a diaper back then too!

 

Momma got a new job...

Even though I've been teaching for the past three years, for the most part I think of myself as a stay-at-home mom. I've tried to do my teaching duties (grading, writing lectures, more grading) when the kids are at school or when they're in bed. I've tried, but in that I've failed. I've been more of a work-at-home mom, and quite honestly, I don't think its working out for the girls.

This is a big problem, or rather, a big conflict of interest. I like what I do, and its always been important to me to make sure my lectures are polished. That takes time, a lot of time, and slowly but surely I've been finding more and more of that time during the day when I'm supposed to be taking care of the girls. Instead of spending time together, Nora and Emily have been amusing themselves in the playroom. While this isn't bad once in a while, it became all too often when I was teaching three classes. I hate the phrase, "Not now girls, I'm busy on the computer". Worse is the whiny, "I'm Workingggggg"

At the end of last semester, I realized I'd given up all of my time with the girls and I wasn't even happy with the online course I'd developed. Something had to change. The writing was really on the wall when, as the spring semester approached, most of my classes were empty. Why I was surprised at this foreseeable development is still a mystery to me; my spring enrollments are always low. That is what I get for teaching at weird, off the wall times (evenings and weekends). However, its that or not teach at all. The pay is so measly for what I do, and there's no guaranteeing a class will run, so finding suitable daycare options for the girls is impossible. Its not uncommon for me to have less than 48 hours notice if I am working or not; how can anyone line up quality care for their kids in 48 hours? And certainly its not fair to find someone willing to watch the girls only to fire them before they begin. Not my style!

Let's review...when I teach my kids are neglected. When I teach, I never know when or for how long my gig will last, so I can't give the girls any kind of predictability, something Emily needs in order to keep talking. When I teach, I don't make a lot of money, but it helps. When I don't teach, my poor husband worries about paying the bills. Oh yeah, and if I'm teaching, its always during cheap airfare season so we never ever get to go anywhere. (Feel free to read that as a whine).

Seriously, is it any surprise I went looking for jobs that were not adjunct teaching??

Anyways, I'm pleased to announce I was hired by my alma mater, and I begin a sweet, part-time gig next month. I'll be working in the Department of Southeast Asian Studies 3 days a week. It pays enough for me to hire someone to watch Emily in the afternoons, and Nora will be able to go to school full time. I will interact with a lot of foreign students and staff, and will get a thorough education in the behind-the-scenes aspects of study abroad, something I've wanted to do for years. Best part? I can still teach one ART 100 class a semester, but if I don't teach, its no big deal. (And maybe we could actually go somewhere??)

This new job is a 2 year post. At the end of the 2 years, Emily will be in kindergarten, and I can decide at that point what will come next for me and our family. Will I pursue my academic dreams or become a hippie? Go back to school for an Ed.D or landscape design? Maybe Ryan and I will start a non-profit charity. Maybe we'll run off to Italy...I hear they're our greatest European ally at the moment. We could teach English while the girls learn italiano. Or stay put, because I like being an office assistant! Who knows where this journey will take us. Its always exciting to start something new.

Random Silly Pics

I was going through Picassa the other day and found a bunch of old photos of Nora from before I started this blog. I thought I'd start sharing them. Looking back really warms my heart!

This one isn't silly so much as just plain cute. I took this a few weeks prior to starting grad school. She was so pretty, and I loved posing her. Actually, looking back at this does make me laugh. I had forgotten how her hair used to stand straight up! I feared she'd have to have a crew cut. How wrong I was, she did inherit her Aunt Stephanie's gorgeous locks after all. This was taken in August of 2005.

BLIZZARD!!!!

It was billed as the storm of the century. I don't watch network news yet still managed to hear the buzz. A major snowstorm was set to hit 33 states and bring the nation to a halt. Forecasters were calling for up to 20 inches of snow where we live, and 24 inches in Chicago. The hype was palpable. Snowpocalypse 2011 was due at 3:00 p.m. on Tuesday, February 1st.

While I usually ignore such warnings because they're more hype than help, something told me to listen this time. I told the girls we were in for major weather, and to expect that we'd be stuck in the house for a day or more. The day before the blizzard the we went to store to stock up on PB&J, baked beans, and other non-perishable snacks. We had plenty of water and plenty of gas. I dug out the sleeping bags in case it got chilly, and asked Ryan to bring in 20 logs in case we lost power due to ice and high winds. And then we waited (and laughed heartily at all of the funny stuff people were saying... I saw reports of Yeti sightings!)

The snow started falling at 8:15 Tuesday morning. I sat alone in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, watching the flakes drift here and there. It was really beautiful, and it started piling up early on. At noon our city declared a state of emergency, and asked everyone to get off of the roads asap. Emily got home from school ok, and we went to pick up Nora. By 2:00, the blizzard had started. Driving was pretty scary, considering the wind was whipping the snow, which was coming down in considerable quantity and was very powdery in consistency. It was the worst visibility I had seen (or hadn't seen???) in town. Since we were out and about, we picked up Ryan as well, who was asked to leave work by 3pm.

It snowed, but life went on. Nora played My Little Pony. Emily demanded to play Angry Birds. Dinner was normal. The girls and I wore footie jammies and watched Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs in honor of the bizzaro weather. Emily went to bed at the regular time, and Nora and I enjoyed a roaring fire. By 9:00, Nora snuggled close to me because the wind was whipping not only around, but through, the house. The drafts were especially drafty, and snow managed to get onto the enclosed front porch. Nora and I turned out the lights and watched the snow. Maybe it would be more accurate to say we watched the wind. It was amazing...we heard the rumble of the wind as it approached, and when it reached a roar you could see the wind in the road. Snow came blowing and swirling, there were eddies and mini tornadoes flying by the house. Then the sound would lessen, and the snow would fall rather than blow, until the next gust. It reminded me of watching the waves come ashore. Nora felt like Dorothy.

Ryan woke me up the next morning and told me to look outside. HOLY MOLY!!!! We got 18.7 inches of snow. It was everywhere. I've never seen so much snow in all my life. The look on Nora's face when we opened the back door to a mountain of snow was priceless. SNOW DAY!!! Weeee!!!!

The dog and I were out at 8:45 am. She was a little confused, since she usually doesn't go in the front yard, but we couldn't get to the back. The snow made it on our covered stoop; the dog didn't know where the stairs were! We tromped through the snow laughing (and barking). Lacey kept getting stuck; I couldn't believe it was up to my knees. Some of the drifts were as high as my shoulders. I plodded a path to the backyard so Nora could come outside and play. As soon as I had snapped some pictures, I went back inside to fetch her. We played for about 30 minutes. She made snow angels, and pretended that the drifts were ocean waves that she "surfed", although it appeared she spent more time paddling than standing. Once we were too cold to play longer, we went inside.

However, the sun came out around noon, and it was so lovely I couldn't bear to stay in the house. Ryan had gone out to shovel the drive, and when I checked on him, I found him helping our neighbor Alex. We share a driveway, and due to the way the wind was blowing, the drifts had piled on her side, leaving our side bare in areas. I got a shovel and pitched in, because all together we had 3 cars to dig out. It was fun, helping out. We could hear other neighbors shoveling and laughing and snow-blowing too. By this time, the whole neighborhood had come alive. Nothing like a good natural disaster to bring people together.

Once the drive was cleared, I took both girls out to play. Emily was overwhelmed by the snow, because in places the drifts were higher than she was. Poor little girl got stuck more than once, but she had a good time. Miles joined in, and we spent another 60 minutes outside. Nora and Miles made a serious of moats and castles and islands. They had mapped out the backyard quite extensively before a pretend earthquake came and destroyed their village. Even prior to the "earthquake", I can say I was, for sure, absolutely exhausted by 3pm. It was an incredible 24 hours.

PS Thursday was a snow day too!! Weeeee!!!!

Snowpocalypse 2011

January 2011 in Pictures

The month of January came and went in the blink of an eye. With the holidays over, things returned to as normal as they can be around here. The girls are back to school and enjoying it immensely, Nora's first adult tooth popped through the gum behind the baby tooth, and I found out I would return to teaching. The biggest change has been that we've taken Emily out of Montessori on Fridays, since I am at home all day long. That was a sad decision, but financially necessary. Since there aren't any real stories to write about, I'll include a few snippets below.

We spent New Year's with my best friend Lisa, her hubby Bob, and their children Shane and Sarah. Nora managed to stay up till midnight, and here we are! Ryan and I were beyond exhausted, but Nora continued to jump up and down till about 12:30.

The girls and their Dad had a dance party one evening after Ryan got home from work...too much fun!

Emily and her iPod!!! She managed to sneak it into bed, and we didn't hear her playing Bejeweled until 10pm! You can see also that (1) she still prefers sleeping in a nest rather than in a neat and tidy bed and (2) she has the lantern in bed with her as well, presumably to help her see as she continues to sneak around hours after bedtime!!!

During the month of January, Nora and her classmates did their first research project. Nora was given the task of learning about the Emperor Penguin, and then making a poster to share with the preschoolers at the Montessori. The funniest part of the entire experience, for me, was when we watched March of the Penguins. There is, at the beginning, a mating scene, but its tastefully done. As we were sitting there and I was thinking, "OH NO!!! I should have previewed this before showing it!!!", Nora said, "Look Mom! They're dancing!" PHEW!!! After the movie we made the poster. Nora did most of the work, although I made the big "P" with glitter. The kit of letters I purchased only had one "P", which isn't enough when you're doing a project on emPeror Penguins.

Resolution 2011

OK....maybe a post on New Year's Resolutions 21 days after the fact is just too untimely, and should be scratched. Actually, I've written and re-written this post over the past few weeks, but it hasn't been satisfactory until now. This year I am really serious about the resolution, the chance for a new beginning, but I wanted to be sure I actually know what it is I want from 2011 before posting it publicly.

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I spent most of the wee hours of January 1st crying my eyes out. It dawned on me that my dear Grandparents would not have the opportunity to see the new year, to make the changes that needed to be made, to explore and learn and see where life could take them. Their story is over now. Someday that's going to be me too, and that really depressed me. I've continued to think about it since then, and have tried to put some perspective on the whole thing. This ride we call life, the unknown that we call death, does not function to make us feel depressed, not really. It's there, I think, to make us get our act together. Once you lose someone you love, you realize you don't have an unlimited amount of time. To think so is actually rather dangerous. (Several artists on my Matchbox 20 Pandora station have underscored this point recently, I think, to make sure I'm paying attention).

OK Rob, I hear you...my world is really burning to the ground! But now what? Ryan asked me what I wanted to do with 2011, and I came up with a big old blank. Nada. That is simply unacceptable, considering the above realization. Since then I've been formulating an answer, and here it is. Drumroll please....

Resolution 2011: Focus less on "me" and more on "us".

Now, I realize you were probably expecting something much more profound, or a statement in which I vowed to save the world. Sorry, I can't do that! I can only start here at home, and this is the best resolution I could come up with. But I stand behind it, I think its a good one. Its something I think I can succeed at, and just by trying, its a win-win for everyone involved. Here's the reasoning behind the resolution.

I need to focus less on "me" the teacher, and even "me" the Mom. I have a lot of ego and a lot of preconceived notions rolled up into those roles. Those two forces lead to unhappiness here in the house. Me the teacher spends too much time away from the girls while I grade or write lectures. Me the teacher oftentimes feels slighted when student sleep through that same lecture that deprived me of precious moments with my family. Me the teacher gets my knickers in a twist when I don't know when my next teaching gig is going to show up, even though I willingly signed up for a part-time job with no benefits and no guarantee of work. Me the teacher needs to remember the reason why I chose this profession: I love art, I love school, and adjunct teaching allows me more time with my kids than anything else I could find.

Me the Mom also needs to lighten up. Since my job is so erratic, I can't afford to always serve organic food. Get over it! The kids don't care. The landscaping in the front yard is really hideous. Well, its January and everything is covered in snow, so stop searching the internet for shrubbery! Who am I cleaning this house up for anyhow, my family or Kim and Aggie? Do the girls really care how often I mop? Does Ryan really give a hoot if there are dishes in the sink? Now, don't take this paragraph to mean I am a stellar housekeeper; in fact, I am not so good at housekeeping at all! And I beat myself up over this fact all the time. Guess how fun I am to be around when I'm pouting about the piles of laundry...

As I said, time to focus on US the family. I need to realize that I am not a teacher, teaching is just something I do. I enjoy it a lot of the time, but I can't let that task define me. I am going to spend less time being so OCD about classwork, period. My kids need me to spend more time with them, and not be stressed over teaching assignments! As for me the mom, I am going to think about the what is best for the family first, rather than what I simply want. Accepting what is rather than wishing for perfection will make living under this roof more enjoyable. And the chores? Well, Nora and Emily have been good about pitching in before, so its time to dust off the chore chart!

I truly hope to achieve a happier and more balanced life by putting the needs of the family over my personal wants and needs. In the end, I need to succeed. Because, as I noted earlier, someday I am not going to be here. Guess what? I can't take anything with me when I go. My degrees, my teaching files on my thumb drive, my house, and my garden have to stay behind. So spending all my time focusing on that stuff is a huge waste of time anyways. I can, however, leave something precious when its my time to find out what happens after the last breath. I can leave my kids with the memories of time spent together, time in which they felt love. I can leave my family with lessons of what it means to think about someone other than yourself, and how that is actually the source of happiness. And hopefully I will leave some grateful students behind too, having taught them to seek out beauty in the world and enjoy it, if only for a moment.